May 3, 2022
Anyone who has ever taught children can relate to this idea that you have your lesson plan, but you also have your willingness to throw it out and surrender to what’s alive in the room in that moment.
Those are precisely the moments that can create the biggest shifts in their sense of possibility. The same goes for us grown-ups.
If you’re an adult that habitually jumps in with your own story when someone is sharing something deeply vulnerable, that doesn’t make you a bad person, but it is a sign that you’re not present to your own intuition, or the nascent magic of the moment.
However, rather than shaming the knee-jerk anecdotal response for not meeting our communication needs, we can learn to identify what we desire to receive from our interactions.
While there are guiding principles when it comes to effective communication and inspired self-expression, there is no one-size-fits-all approach.
Some folks love hearing your relatable stories. Some folks love for you to help brainstorm solutions to a problem. And some folks love for you to just listen. All are valid.
So although it is foundational to learn to listen and empathize, also be willing to ask questions to help determine what specific kinds of feedback loops to create with another that will serve the highest good for all of you.
This insight comes from years of:
* interactions where I “just listened” and felt invisible
* I gave unsolicited advice that was well-received and changed someone’s life
* I received empty platitudes of empathy when I DID desire concrete support in solving a problem.
Those moments showed me that clear, inspired, transformational communication does not necessarily follow a strict set of rules.
It’s largely about self-awareness, presence, humility (being willing to acknowledge when you don’t know, and being willing to ask), and energetic literacy (how to read a person, how to read a room).
Are you looking to deepen your listening and heighten your expression? Invest in Voke. Over the course of 6 sessions, we’ll use creative vocal self-expression to identity and release your communication blockages.
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My work serves holistic-oriented women committed to moving beyond fear and emotional stuckness to voice their truth, expressive arts enthusiasts whose souls are deeply nourished by community vocal rituals, spiritual eclectics who embrace wisdom from a wide variety of sources, or some combination of these.
Through structured group improvisation and vocal embodiment practices, I facilitate sound healing sessions, workshops, private vocal empowerment coaching, retreats, and concerts that “a-ha!” you to new levels of self-discovery, emotional freedom, joy and creative flow. I am a partner artist at Carnegie Hall’s Weill Music Institute as a core member of the vocal improvisation ensemble, Moving Star.